Writing

Paper 2 Part B · 約 400 字

Story / Recount

Audience: 故事讀者. 完整敘事弧:衝突→高潮→收束,時態一致

結構

  1. 1

    Opening

    時間地點人物 + 異常。避免 Long long ago。

  2. 2

    Rising action

    問題升級,用對話與感官細節,每句推進情節。

  3. 3

    Climax

    一個決定或意外。不要用 then I woke up。

  4. 4

    Resolution

    後果 + 一句感悟即可,勿寫成通識結論段。

句式

  • The last MTR train had already gone when…
  • I should have walked away. Instead I…
  • Nobody spoke for a full five seconds.
  • By the time the corridor lights came on, …

範文(教師向:接近考場篇幅)

The umbrella that was not mine

Rain hammered the covered walkway outside the public library. I grabbed a black umbrella from the stand — ours, I thought — and ran for the minibus, bag thumping against my hip. The street had become a river with headlights in it. At the door a girl my age said, “That’s my tape on the handle.” A strip of faded washi, cats wearing raincoats. I had never seen it. My ears went hot. I held the umbrella out with both hands, like a confession, and started to apologise to the rain as well as to her. She did not snatch it. She tilted it so we both fitted, and we walked to the stop without discussing justice. A bus threw water at our knees. She asked which floor I had been on. I said the study room. She said she had been looking for a history of the harbour and had found a book about fish instead. I laughed too loudly. On the minibus I stared at my wet sleeves and understood how easily a person can be sure and wrong at the same time. I had been sure the way you are sure of a password you typed a hundred times. The tape had been there all year, probably. I had never looked. The next Saturday I bought a cheap yellow umbrella that nobody else would want. I still look for cats on other people’s handles. When I find them I do not touch. I just remember the walk to the stop, two strangers under one mistake, and how she never asked for the umbrella back in a raised voice — only for the truth of a strip of paper.

Checklist

  • 過去時為主
  • 有衝突
  • 高潮不是夢
  • 結尾短而具體

失分點

  • 只有對話沒有場景
  • 時態在過去與現在之間跳
  • 結局是一場夢
  • 人名過多卻沒有衝突

老師改卷時在比的三段

約 Level 3–4 段(老師會覺得『有寫但空』)

Pollution is a very serious problem in Hong Kong. We should raise awareness and everyone must work together to protect the environment. If we don’t, the future will be bad.

約 Level 5 段(老師會給發展分)

After six, many S.6 students revise in 24-hour fast-food shops and buy a drink they do not want so they will not be asked to leave. A staffed classroom until 10:30 would cost the school a duty teacher, not a new building. That is a narrower, more honest request than ‘raise awareness’.

約 Level 5**–6 段(老師覺得『這人見過世界』)

The Housing letter called the wet market ‘under-utilised’. Mrs Lam’s stall is empty on Tuesdays, yes; it is also the only place on the estate where a family can take three pieces of fish and pay on Friday. A supermarket can mop the floor. It cannot keep that kind of credit. When we applaud an ‘upgrade’, we should say who loses the unofficial overdraft.

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